Handing a child their first phone is a big moment, and the settings menus don't make it any easier. The good news: every modern phone already has free parental controls built in. You don't need to buy an app, and you don't need to be technical. You need about half an hour, the child's phone, your own phone, and this page.
Here's the plain version: which controls come with which phone, the five things worth switching on, a starting point by age, and the honest bit about what these tools can and can't do.
Step one: what phone is it?
The controls depend on who made the phone's software. Pick the guide that matches, and keep this page open for the big picture.
- iPhone (or iPad). Apple's controls are called Screen Time, and they work through Family Sharing, linking your Apple account to your child's. Our step-by-step guide: iPhone Screen Time.
- Android phone (Samsung, Google Pixel, Motorola and most others). Google's controls are called Family Link, managed from an app on your own phone. Our guide: Google Family Link.
- Windows computer or Xbox. Microsoft's controls are called Family Safety. Worth setting up alongside the phone if your child has a laptop or console. Our guide: Microsoft Family Safety.
- A basic phone (calls and texts, perhaps a camera). Often the simplest answer for younger children: there's very little to lock down because there's very little on it.
One honest note, since we sell de-Googled Pixels ourselves: a phone running GrapheneOS doesn't work with Google's Family Link. If you want Family Link's controls, a standard Android phone is the simpler choice. See the Family Link guide.
The five things to set up on any phone
Whichever phone it is, the same five settings do most of the work. Each platform guide shows you exactly where to find them.
1. Screen-time limits and a bedtime
Set a daily limit and a “downtime” window, for example 8pm to 7am, when only calls (and any apps you choose) work. Bedtime is the one most parents say they wish they'd set from day one: it's far easier to start strict and relax than the other way round.
2. App approvals: nothing installs without you
Turn on approval for downloads and purchases. Apple calls it Ask to Buy; Google's Family Link has approvals for app downloads and purchases. Your child taps “ask”, your phone gets a request, you say yes or no. This one setting stops most surprises: new social apps, games with chat, and in-app spending.
3. Content filters
Every platform has age ratings for apps, films and music, plus a website filter. Set them to your child's age. It's worth also switching on the free filters from your home broadband provider. The UK Safer Internet Centre recommends both, and is clear that “no filter or parental controls tool is 100% effective”, which is why the rest of this list matters.
4. Location sharing
Apple's Find My and Google's Family Link can show you where the phone is. Decide as a family what it's for: “so I know you got to school” lands better than silent tracking, and older children will find out anyway. Agree it openly and it becomes a safety net, not a secret.
5. A passcode your child doesn't know
The controls are only as strong as the code that protects them. On an iPhone that's the Screen Time passcode. With Family Link the controls live on your phone and your Google account. Don't use your child's birthday, and don't type it in where they can watch.
The “basic apps only” approach
If you want a first smartphone to behave more like a simple phone, combine the settings above:
- Always allowed: phone, messages, maps, camera, and perhaps a music app.
- Everything else asks first: approvals on, so each new app is a conversation, not a surprise.
- No browser, or a filtered one: both Apple and Google let you restrict or remove web browsing for younger children.
- Short limits on anything with a feed: if you allow YouTube or games, give them a daily allowance rather than open access.
You can loosen it a step at a time as your child shows they can handle it. That's a much easier conversation than taking things away.
A starting point by age
Every child is different, so treat this as a starting point to adjust, not a rulebook.
Under 11
- A basic phone, or a smartphone set to “basic apps only”.
- Approvals on for every download and purchase.
- Downtime from early evening; phone charged outside the bedroom.
- Location sharing on, explained as a safety thing.
11 to 12 (starting secondary school)
- Approvals still on, but agree a list of apps together.
- A daily limit for games and video, generous for calls, maps and school apps.
- Content filters at their age rating; web filter on.
- Talk about group chats and what to do if something upsetting turns up.
13 to 15
- Move from blocking to agreeing: fewer hard limits, clear house rules.
- Keep purchase approvals on, even if you relax app approvals.
- Keep bedtime downtime. It's the rule that protects sleep.
- Social media: see the UK changes below. Most big platforms already set 13 as their minimum age.
What's changing in the UK
Under the Online Safety Act, sites with adult or harmful content must now check ages, which is why you'll see more ID and face-scan checks. On 15 June 2026 the government announced a ban on social media for under-16s, expected to come into force in spring 2027. It says messaging apps like WhatsApp and Signal aren't intended to be covered, and some restrictions will be on by default for 16 and 17-year-olds too. Our explainer has the detail: the Online Safety Act, explained plainly.
That's helpful, but it won't set up your child's phone for you. The settings above still matter, especially for games, video and messaging, which the ban isn't aimed at.
The honest bit
We're a privacy company, so it would be odd not to mention this. These controls are made by Apple, Google and Microsoft. To manage your child's phone they need an account for your child, and those companies collect data from the phones they run, just as they do from yours. Using their controls is still the right call for most families. They're free, they work, and they're far better than nothing. Just set up your child's account with the minimum personal details it needs, and look through the privacy settings while you're in there.
Two more things worth knowing:
- Controls don't replace talking. The UK Safer Internet Centre's advice is to talk to your children about staying safe online and make sure they know they can come to you if something goes wrong. A child who'll tell you about a problem is safer than one with perfect settings who won't.
- Children find workarounds. A friend's phone, a school laptop, an old tablet in a drawer. Don't treat it as a battle you can win with settings. Treat the settings as the default, and the conversation as the real protection.
A simpler phone, when it's ready
We're working on Takeback Family: simple phones that keep children reachable without handing them social media, an addictive feed or ad tracking. It's launching soon, and if you'd like to hear when it does, you can leave your email on that page. In the meantime, everything on this page works on the phone your child already has.